Broken

It's interesting how humans are.  I've grown up with a sheltered life.  I didn't always think so.  But now the older I get the more I understand just how sheltered it was.  It's hard to understand why, exactly, it takes some huge, life altering event or some big tragedy to make us appreciate the people in our lives...but often that is the case.  Tonight a member of our church family is gone due to a motorcycle accident.  It doesn't seem fair...a hardworking man, good provider, wonderful husband and devoted dad...gone from this world.  HE is in a much better place...but his family is broken tonight.  Angry at the God they know and love...

I held onto my babies tonight tighter than ever.  I kissed Will five more times before I let his dad lay him down to sleep.  I held Lucy and told her over and over how thankful I was for her and her brother.  And I hugged my husband with my heart hurting, wondering what I would ever do without him.

My Mom and I had a conversation the other day about growing up.  She told me that she was certain that I would be "ok" when she was gone.  I would be able to go on, take care of my family and handle my life without her.  I don't have such confidence in myself.  I am still very much a momma's girl...I STILL get homesick for my parents and the comfort they always provided in our home growing up.  I always felt safe from everything in that house on Locust St.  I yearn for that comfort tonight...I wish I could go back and be as sheltered as I once was.  There is so much sadness that I'd rather not be exposed to.

Tragedies make me want to hold tight to the ones I love.  It makes me ache inside trying to find ways to keep them safe.  I talked to every member of my immediate family today...I'm thankful for that.  They all know how much they are loved.  You NEVER know what life has planned for you. 

Tonight my prayer is this, comfort for those hurting....peace and healing to a family that has granted so much of the same to others...and above all... courage to understand that tonight their son, husband, dad and brother is being welcomed, with open arms, into the Kingdom by his Heavenly Father.